Frogtown Times


FROGTOWN -- The Frogtown Times is back in print! It's been at least two years. We'll have to catch up on some of the news.

Be careful, Joey News. There is a newspaper called the Dolland News, although it may change its name to Dolland Microscopic Examiner.

How Can Dolland Be Improved?

THE LOCATION DOESN'T MATTER -- How can it? This is the most pressing problem facing us. It could mean, as the Joey News says, facing a 30-year wait before new Gods come to help us. That's a long time.

What has held Dolland up in the past is sports. The problem is that when sports take a break, dolls take a break. Sports would be even more fun if they were a part of the doll community; instead, they have been the community.

Joey may be the Renaissance Animal (or thing) of Dolland. He is trying to establish an economy. He is making stores and restaurants.

That's, on the surface, what we obviously need. How would animals make a profit? Newspaper reporters could by letting companies advertise in their newspapers. As an example: A baseball club. It wants animals to come to their games, so it can pay its players. It advertises in our paper, which makes us money, as well as the money we get from selling it. We'd have to distribute the paper, however; that would take some of it away.

The club has people come to its games. They pay to get into the stadium. The club divides its money among its owner, players, groundskeepers, etc. You can see how easy it is for an owner to be poor if not enough people come to his club's games. He may be in debt to his players. Thus it is best if the owner of a team is very rich.

Say the team is the Dogland D's. Furry is paid. He walks downtown to buy...

What? That is the question. Should Dolland be limited to newspapers and sports? Forget the "food tax", Joey; it's now a good idea.

I suggest leisure-time activities. Places where animals can do things. Swimming pools. Dancing clubs. Games -- life-size video games that animals can actually participate in, so to speak (like "video" games). Theaters -- put on plays! Ice-skating rinks. The TV show "Dolland's 7" can strengthen this, instead of "being" Dolland's main activity for a while.

It can be done!

"Dolland's 7" News

FROGTOWN -- The first reel of the program "Dolland's 7" has been completed!

The film reel was only 3 1/2 minutes long, so it did not take long to complete it; filming was done in slightly over two hours at the location of Philadelphia. Just the day after next, the film was sent out of Dolland (way, way out) to be developed.

And "7" producers say it came out great! Splicing (rearranging film into the right order) will be needed, and some shots were darker than was wanted, but it's said the darkness will not hamper viewer enjoyment; import parts can still be seen, and also the film was viewed on a screen with a low-power light-bulb.

More location work will be required in Philadelphia; then the location will switch (where, producers won't yet say). The new location, however, will require many complicated setups which may take an entire day to build. Thus filming could take up to four days, including filming done in Philadelphia.

The film and equipment is currently stored in Frogtown.

Frogtown Theater to Open

FROGTOWN -- A Frogtown Theater? Yes! The first of its kind, it will be a classy, official place to watch plays put on by various stuffed animal actors.

Different plays will be shown, but how they change is a sketchy point right now. Each play will probably be rehearsed once or twice, then shown on two different days, how many times per day varying on their popularity.

This program offers would-be actors, such as Mindy, and ones already established, such as Lizard Coburn, to perform. It also answers another, perhaps even more serious, question: where will "Dolland's 7" episodes be shown?

The answer is, for the first time, at a huge stuffed animal theater. The film will then be taken to various local theaters, such as the Frogtown Theater (the actual name is not clear right now), for repeated showings all through the week.

Scheduled "Dolland's 7" actors will probably "warm up" with plays in the Frogtown Theater. Other theaters, also, will probably be opening up to get ready for their main events with stage plays.

Talent Section


by Adrian Dantly

Frog tried to swim to Bermuda.
On the way he met a barracuda.
He was ready to stab it with a harpoon
when he found it was just a kid's blow-up balloon.

In 1982 on a certain day
There was a very famous baseball play.
Joey gave up a single to Froggie Valenzuela
And, oh, how the Joeys did groan!
But that was nothing compared to when Joey threw the ball backwards
And Froggie ran all the way home.

A fly ball hit down the left-field line
On no! There's no way Frog can catch it this time!
But Frog really flew, and what happened but--
"Oh my! What a great play!" I said.
Uh-oh... there goes the throw to first base
Ten feet over Plastic Frog's head.


Map of Dolland




by Dave Kingfrog